Hello and See Ya

He came, and he’s gone. His visits are bittersweet. So far between but so explosive in their short lives. I wish I knew what he thinks, how he feels. He lives in my heart, but his is an enigma. I would ask, but I fear the answer, that I am a convenience, that I am a port in the storm, but not lasting, not something he cares about, not somebody he holds dear.

His kisses say differently. His touch says differently…His caress lights a fire and his mouth douses the flame, kindling the ember that burns and grows hotter. He came into town on Monday. I was in the bath when he arrived, and came out to greet him. We chatted and retired to my bedroom. Before Ted even came into the room, Ryan’s mouth was on mine, his breath in my lungs, his hands in my hair. The three of us made love like we had never been apart, exploring one another, touching and tasting. Ryan and I kissed and my hand wandered down, finding Ted’s head, his mouth engulfing Ryan. “Does it turn you on, watching your husband suck my cock?” I moaned a yes and disappeared into his kiss again.

Tuesday, we met for dinner. Wednesday was our last day together. He bound my breasts and abused them beautifully. The bruises are fading, too long before they will be replaced. My fingers ache to caress his body, to hold him to me, to see him and Ted suckling each of my breasts, to feel his cock in my mouth as I sit astride Ted, to feel his fingers inside me.

Does he ache? Does he lie in bed, envisioning my lips on his body? Do his fingertips tingle at the thought of caressing me? Does the memory of my kiss bring a smile to his lips?


I Wish

I wish I could show you just how you make me feel. How you make my heart race yet calm it at the same time. How you clear my mind of all the clutter and fill it with only you, only light, only warmth and love. I wish you could feel what your touch feels like, tiny electric charges throughout my body, pulling from my core. Lighting up all the hidden and dark places, awakening every nerve ending. How the feel of your lips on my skin creats heat paths that lead directly to my groin, quickening my breath and weakening my knees. How looking into your eyes, I see through the here and now and into another level, beyond the trivial worries and into a realm of passion and desire and fulfillment.

I love that I can experience you.

Love and Connections

So, I recently read a blog post talking about married people and how maybe they are married because they CAN’T date anymore. To me, it felt like it made marriage a “well, I’m out of options, I guess I have to settle for you” kind of thing.

As a person who has been married to one man for 19 years, we have four children together, we have come from just about nothing to being able to manage without too much trouble…I didn’t settle for anything. What it was more like was, I met this person and I fell in love with him and it reached a point that I could not envision any time in my life where I did not want him there. I wanted to share everything with him, my success, my failures, my love, my light, my joy and my sorrows. He is my best friend, I tell him everything and he supports me and is there for me.

This is not to mean that I don’t have other friends, and over the past few years we have opened our marriage and I have fallen in love with another man and I feel similarly toward him, though not on quite the same level. To me, individuals are different and the feelings you have for them will be different. I don’t think I’ll ever love anyone the same way I love my husband, but that doesn’t mean that I won’t love somebody else similarly…just not exactly the same.

I do love to date. I love the feeling of new relationship energy and that first kiss and learning a new person’s likes and dislikes and connecting. And eventually, with a few people, I reach that point where I do love them, even if I may not be IN love with them. And these are not always romantic interests, I have grown to care deeply for a large number of people. One of the things that happens when I care deeply for a person, whether in a romantic way or a platonic way, I become defensive of them. I don’t want to see them suffer, I don’t want to see them hurt. If somebody accuses them of something that I know they are not capable of doing, I become angry, and I actually feel hurt that somebody would do that to somebody I care about. Example: If I have a friend who I know is an animal lover and somebody says they saw her beat a dog to unconsciousness, I am going to react strongly. I know my friend is not capable of doing that, I know that there is no scenario in which she would do something like that. And I will view the person making that accusation as a threat. I will separate myself from that person because I feel that person is no good for me, if they are willing to make such accusations. And I will question other people who support that person and don’t stand up to them for making that accusation, who just take their word and don’t think about it.

The more I care about a person, the stronger this reaction is. If a person accuses my husband of something that I know he cannot do, I will react strongly. Especially if I feel that those accusations could have further repercussions that would reach to my children and the rest of my family. He is more than my husband, he is more than a friend, he is my family. And I feel similarly toward other people. People I have known longer, people I have deeper connections with, they are more than friends or acquaintances, they are family. And I will protect them. I will defend them. I will feel hurt if somebody tries to hurt them.

It makes me sad to think that there are people who have never felt this. To think that there are people who have never had that level of connection with another person that they don’t understand that feeling of love and protection. I hope, some day, everyone has that…that everyone has somebody they want to protect and somebody who will protect them.


slowly moving closer

brushing, barely touching


a warm breath

a flick of a tongue

a soft smile

a gentle moan


fingers in your hair



the caress of a tongue

wetting, touching, licking

a nibble of teeth

an intake of breath


pressing together

pushing and crushing


dancing tongue

quickening breath

flushing flesh

rising heat

Getting Comfortable

Hank and Stephen

“So, wanna hit Stephen’s place for a movie?” I asked.

“Sure,” Hank answered. It was a quiet day and nothing much to do. I texted Stephen, asking what he was up to. He agreed that watching a movie sounded like a plan so we headed over.

Hank and I had been married for almost 5 years. Hank had met Stephen on a business trip a few years after we had gotten married. They had sat next to each other on the flight, struck up conversation, and the friendship was born.

I sat between them and the warm, relaxed feeling from the wine spread through my body. I laughed as the men joked over the ridiculous dialogue in the movie. I leaned into Hank who gave me a quick kiss on the lips. I felt the pull in my stomach that radiated downward in a warm wave that made my mind wander and I allowed my hand to drop to his lap. Stephen pretended not to notice. My hand got more bold, working its way up to Hank’s zipper. I noticed Stephen out of the side of my vision, adjusting himself and attempting to hide his growing erection. I smiled and got more blatant with my manipulation of Hank’s cock through his jeans. He sighed quietly and put his hand over mine, guiding my fingers and palm, encouraging me to massage with more pressure. Stephen cleared his throat and went into the kitchen for another drink, but I could see him peeking from behind the partition. His face was flushed and the thought of him watching me and Hank pushed me farther and I got his zipper down and maneuvered my hand into his pants. Hank groaned and turned so that his lap was hidden from Stephen. He whispered “What are you doing??? Stephen is right there and watching!”

“I know! It’s making me so hot. Do you mind him watching? Or….” my hand trailed away from his throbbing erection and I could feel how much he wanted me to continue.

“Ok, but we can’t be rude. We have to make sure he doesn’t mind.”

Hank cleared his throat and said, louder, “Hey, Steve?”

“Yeah?” Stephen answered, pretending he was busy in the kitchen.

“How about a round of shots? We brought this cinnamon stuff that’s really good! My wife can come in and help you set them up.”

I gave his cock one last gentle squeeze, rubbing a bit of his oozing precum between my fingers. As I stood up, I licked my fingers and smiled wickedly at Hank. Stephen was standing at the kitchen counter, keeping his back to me. I made sure to brush against him frequently as I helped set up three rounds of shots, noticing how his ears were scarlet and his breathing was accelerated. I made eye contact with him as I took the bottle of alcohol and his vibrant blue eyes were dilated with nervous lust.
Hank and Stephen were fairly equally matched as far as height and build. Both were close to six feet tall, lean but muscular, and athletic. Stephen had straight, pale blonde hair that hung past his shoulders. Hank, however, kept his sandy brown hair short and styled. Stephen had a sharp, chiseled jawline and a narrow, refined nose leading to thin lips. His expression could be severe but right now the underlying embers could be seen lighting his flesh. Hank, on the other hand, had a bit more rounded jaw line with a slightly cleft chin. His nose was shorter and a touch upturned, with full lips that begged to be kissed, nibbled and sucked. Hank’s light hazel eyes were a bit less striking than the blue of Stephen’s. The two of them definitely turned heads when they went out.

We took the shots into the living room and toasted “to good friends” and tossed them back. Setting down the shot glasses, I settled in between Stephen and Hank. I snuggled closer to Hank, placing my hand high on his thigh and heard Stephen clear his throat nervously. Hank asked “You mind if we get a bit more comfortable?”

“Get as comfortable as you like,” Stephen said.

“You sure? We can get pretty comfortable…” Hank winked at Stephen.

“Yeah, seriously.” Stephen said, settling back in his seat and giving up on trying to cover his erection.

I looked at Hank and smiled, leaning in for a kiss while my hand made its way farther up his thigh, brushing his scrotum as I made my way to his cock that was getting harder by the second. His tongue danced between my lips as I massaged his hard-on through his pants. He had zipped back up so I quickly unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, getting his cock back out. It was thick and hard and I couldn’t help but bend over and put my mouth around it. I teased with my tongue, flicking around the frenulum and flared glans. It twitched and jumped as I exhaled my warm breath across it. I wrapped my hand around his shaft and slowly engulfed the head in my mouth, gently flicking my tongue across the underside as I drew the entire length into my mouth and down my throat. Hank’s cock wasn’t uncomfortably long, but it was very thick and it was difficult to breathe while it was wedged in my throat. I withdrew and took a deep breath, letting my tongue slip and slide all over his cock’s slippery surface as I slowly took it all into my mouth again. With my face buried in his lap, my hands made their way up to massage his chest and lightly caress his nipples. Hank groaned and wrapped my hair in his hands, guiding my head up and down his cock as I sucked and licked him up and down. I glanced over and saw that Stephen was massaging his own cock through his shorts and I looked at Hank, catching his eye as he gazed down, watching me suck him off. I glanced back at Stephen, asking without words. Hank smiled and nodded, and I reached over to give Stephen a hand with his cock.

I reached into his shorts and felt his slender rock hard dick. Unlike Hank’s intact cock, Stephen was circumcised, though he was loose cut and there was still quite a bit of skin to play with. I slid it up and down, and he wrapped his hand around mine, showing me how much pressure and what speed he liked. I pulled Hank’s cock out of my mouth, wrapping my other hand around it slowly slid his foreskin up and down over the head. Having a hard cock in each hand was amazing, feeling them both pulse and throb to my touch, with both of these hot men putty in my hands. While I continued to jack off Hank, I leaned over and began to slide Stephen’s cock into my mouth. His wasn’t as thick as Hanks, and slid down my throat easier. He let go of my hand and gently placed his hand on the back of my head. I love having him guide me, to do what he likes, and these two were very good instructors.

I had to give more attention to this cock, so I let go of Hank and got on my knees in front of Stephen, to focus on blowing him properly. Hank maneuvered himself behind me, removing the rest of his clothes, and I felt his fingers between my legs, caressing me under my dress and over my panties. I sucked in a breath as he found his way to my clit which was rock hard and throbbing. I could tell my panties were dripping wet, and I was only getting wetter with these two at my service. My panties were thin lacy things, and were not very sturdy. Hank took them in his mouth and pulled, tearing one side off completely. Then I felt his face under me, and his tongue caressed my clit. I moaned loudly as another gush of wetness erupted from my pussy. While Hank’s tongue danced in and out of me, his fingers caressing my pussy lips and exploring, I continued to lick and suck Stephen’s cock. Stephen was nearing the point of no return and grabbed the back of my hair, fucking my face while Stephen’s tongue dived in and out and around my pussy.

“Oh my god, I’m going to cum in your mouth” Stephen groaned, shoving my face down on his cock. I continued to suck and let my tongue caress his cock, dancing around the head and swallowing against it. Hank’s fingers dived deep inside me, hitting my g spot and causing me to cry out as he sucked and flicked his tongue across my clit. He held on as I bucked, reaching a heart stopping orgasm just as Stephen’s cock exploded in my throat. I swallowed it all and licked him clean as Hank came out from under me, his face glistening with my cum.

“I need to taste that pussy,” Stephen said as he helped me sit on the couch.

“Oh it’s delicious, and I’ve got her all warmed up for ya!” Hank replied, as he crawled over, his erection sticking out in front of him. I rolled over and took his cock in my mouth, and felt Stephen’s breath against my ass. His tongue tickled my ass, working its way down to my pussy. Stephen’s tongue was longer than Hank’s, and he knew what he was doing. I lost myself for a moment, as he caressed and licked his way around my vulva and across my asshole. I opened my eyes and saw Hank’s cock right in front of my face and shoved my mouth over it, swallowing it down. I knew exactly how Hank liked it, and I used one hand to brace myself while the other pumped his cock while my tongue swirled around the head. I applied just enough suction to keep him on track, and reached down to caress his balls and slide my finger across his taint. He pulled my hair back from my face with one hand and stroked my cheek with the other as he fucked my face. I looked up into his eyes which were almost emerald. The more turned on he got, the more green his eyes became. I swallowed him down into my throat again and felt Stephen raising up behind me then I felt the head of his cock pressing against my pussy lips. I gasped as he entered me, taking my shoulders in his hands. He matched the rhythm of Hank’s fucking my face and I had both cocks sliding in and out of me in unison. I ground my hips against Stephen’s cock and could feel his balls slapping against my clitoris. Hank’s grip on my hair began to get tighter and I could tell that he was getting close. I slid my finger farther back and tickled his asshole while his cock pumped in and out of my mouth with increasing speed. Finally, he took a deep breath and exhaled with a groan as his cock swelled and pumped my mouth full of hot creamy cum. I sucked him in and felt his legs tremble as he gasped and tried to pull away. I grinned around his cock and sucked the remaining pulses of ejaculation out of him.

With my mouth full of Hank’s cum, I turned around and kissed Stephen, his tongue dove into my mouth and he probed to find every last drop of cum. Hank reached down and caressed my nipples, leaning down to take them into his mouth as Stephen continued to pump me from behind. His cock would slide all the way out and then slowly fill me again, as I impaled myself upon him, grinding myself all the way into his crotch. With Hank licking my nipples, and Stephens long, hard cock filling me from behind, my body was awash in pure ecstasy. I could feel Stephen beginning to reach the brink of orgasm and I squirmed my hips around, helping him reach my most sensitive areas. As he began to fuck me harder, I could feel my own orgasm rising. He put his hands on my hips, ramming himself harder and harder into me, while Hank reached down to fondle my clit as he licked my nipples. That pushed me over the edge and I came hard, pulling Stephen’s cock all the way inside me. The sensation of my orgasm massaging his cock pulled him into his own climax and I could feel his hot cum pulse inside of me.

We stayed as we were for several long moments, enjoying the aftermath. Stephen pulled out of me and Hank laughed, noticing the puddle that was left on the sofa cushion. “So, was that comfortable enough for you?” Stephen asked.